Part 1 - in progress
"I am still trying to break the habit of apologizing for myself - even though I have little hesitation in asking
for help on projects - asking for myself brings out the old, 'Please excuse me.'"
Portraiture is a blend of model and artist that shares something essential about both. Throughout the process, I pay attention to what I bring to the photographic encounter. Unforeseen tensions infuse the images where I least expect, revealing intimacy laced with desire and trepidation.
Using smears, stains, spills and paper crowns, the images from ‘Promise Land’ communicate shame, humiliation, and conflicting feelings of womanhood. Are we too much or not enough?
Our early hopes and expectations - the belief that we can do anything - leave us at odds as we internalize resistance from the world. The shame we begin to learn in childhood shapes us to be both cautious and defiant. How do we stand up when we are continuously taught to sit down?
As an artist, to feel shame is to be suspended between the desire to communicate and the fear of being exposed. We walk a tightrope between hiding and wanting desperately to be seen. My photographs from 'Promise Land' blur the boundaries of what society expects from us and the loss of childhood innocence.